Name of the Week: Rice Edition

WHAT UP WITH THEM PILAFS. 

Congrats to the mad scientist Curenski Gilleyen for winning going away with the Nebraska Name of the Week poll. Obviously it was a little bit disappointing to see that UNLOL had such disappointing names, but I'm pretty pleased right now.

Rice Rice Baby has some names. Well, not that many, but some. Let's talk about them! Runners-up include linebacker Tolu Akinwumi, who challenges Chi Chi Ariguzo for "most singable-along to the tune of Teach Me How To Dougie") offensive lineman Keshawn Carrington - spell that Karrington and we've got an alliteration for the ages - linebacker Jaylon Finner, who quite frankly should be in the poll, defensive lineman Bobby Kiesewetter - excluded when I found out "Kiese" didn't mean "pants" or "bed" in German - Tanners Leland and Shuck, safety Stephen Noh, and tight end Luke Willson, whose brother is not named Owen, I looked it up.

Jumpin jumpin, it's ten fifteen.

No. 83, Andre Gautreaux: The other night I was trying to write a paper, and let me just say this: very few internet things make me laugh. A lot of things I find funny, but me finding things funny doesn't always result in me literally cracking up in my room by myself. For some reason, one of these things that did make me do that was PronunciationManual's Youtube page. Basically, in response to a youtube account (PronunciationBook) that actually teaches you how to pronounce words, it's a page that teaches you how to pronounce words such as MarsKe$ha,and faux pas. I would LOVE to hear them pronounce "Gautreaux". 

GOTRO is a junior wide receiver who has seen his first action this year busting into some regular rotation: he had three catches last week against UTEP and busted out a 47-yard reverse against Houston. 

No. 5, Lovett Gibson: If you don't Lovett, leave it, USA, number one.

Lovett is a freshman wide receiver who don't play cuz he redshirting!

No. 8, Brent Hotard: Last year's winner, ehehehe ho, tard.

The hotard is a MAD RESERVE tight end. He has one start on the year - against Southern Miss - but only has one catch on the season.

No. 6, Driphus Jackson: His parents were big fans of the Dreyfus affair, but not big fans of spelling. Liked because Driphus.

Driphus is a QB who don't play because he redshirtin. He once won a reality TV show calling him the most underrated prep quarterback, which is a thing?

No. 43, Trenton VandeWater: Trenton VandeWater is a character who briefly appeared on season two of the hit TV show "Gossip Girl". He is a Count or something of some country nobody pays attention to. Probably Belgium. 

While not being a fake extremely wealthy person, Trenton is a redshirt freshman linebacker whose player profile photo is pretty hilarious, but that's for me to know and you to find out.

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