Thursday Sips, featuring Northwestern golf, Killing NU-Michigan, and Kafka regret

Evan Habeeb-US PRESSWIRE

Some links, including the next Luke Donald, the last time we ever ever ever ever talk about Northwestern-Michigan, and Mike Kafka should be starting for the Eagles.

We've got a Northwestern basketball game and a Northwestern soccer game, tipping and kicking simultaneously at 7 p.m. Which should you go to? One's more important, but one's more indoors. Look, I'm not here to make decisions for you. I'm just here to give you links, and I did a way better job of it today than normally, I think.

Move over, Luke: Northwestern has its next really talented British golfer, Matt Fitzpatrick, who signed his NLI yesterday to attend Northwestern. Pat FitzMatt Fitzpatrick is the No. 11 amateur in the world, and that presumably counts everybody in college, and also me, so that's not bad. He's the No. 2 golfer under the age of 18 in the world, and won the British Boys' Championship, which I really wish they would just call the "U-18" or something so it doesn't sound like an episode of British Dateline. He will piss the rest of his male friends off at parties for having a British accent for however long it is until he decides to go pro.

Also signing NLI's were Jaren Sina and Nate Taphorn for basketball. Basketball!

No, seriously, let's stop talking about it: But two more things. This:

GAHHHHHH GAHHH STUPID STUPID STUPID (shoots wall with gun) EAT IT WALL EAT IT STUPID STUPID WALL (hits wall with machete) (hits wall with battering ram) (hits wall with fists) (breaks hands)

And this, from the Daily:

Senior cornerback Demetrius Dugar played a rough game against the Wolverines before coming up with a clutch interception late in the fourth quarter. Dugar’s pick with 3 minutes and 47 seconds left created a 19 percent swing in win probability, moving the Cats from 65 percent to 84 percent.

Once NU regained possession, Fitzgerald’s aggressive playcalling improved its odds even more. Fitzgerald asked Colter to convert a fourth and one with just over 3 minutes left, and when the junior quarterback came through, the Cats’ odds jumped another 6 percent to 90.

GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (drives over wall with bulldozer)

and, last but not least, congratulations to commenter danwhite77 for winning This Week in Schadenfruede's prestigious Scott Tenorman of the Week award!

And we're done. Done forever.

If a woman tells you she's 26: Venric Mark said that he's 5-foot-7 and 170 pounds. He's listed at 5-foot-8, 175. So what's he actually? My bet's 4-foot-11, 29 pounds.

KAFKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA: Nick Foles is starting at QB for the Eagles this weekend. If only Mike Kafka hadn't broken his non-throwing hand in preseason, it would likely be him. Kafka, instead, is unemployed. I hate this.

Being smart still sucks with sports: Most coaches want an early signing period. Bud Elliott writes about why Stanford's David Shaw doesn't, and why Pat Fitzgerald would probably follow suit.

#MACtion: Loved this post by Bruce Feldman on our friends in the MAC, which sorta kinda sorta raises the question: was the MAC better than the B1G this year? Probably not. But you can make the case, certainly. Either way, apparently we lucked out by scheduling BCS teams and not, like Central Michigan.

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