So, most of the women's lacrosse coverage on this site has been done by the professionals, i.e. Herman, who, like, understands, knows, and pays attention to the Northwestern women's lacrosse team. Like, I mean, come on, read his story the other day - he got on the Final Four conference call and talked to coach Kelly Amonte Hiller and UNC's coach.
But now that it's the Final Four, we at Sippin' on Purple are busting out the big guns, i.e. ME. Whereas Herman is a professional journalist who has some access to the team and knows about the sport, I'm an idiot with a blog, who as of tonight, is finished with his gig as sports editor at the Daily Northwestern. Meaning I got no more lax stories to read and no more columns to write, and no more burden of pretending to be somewhat objective on this website.
So let's discuss
WHY YOU SHOULD HATE NORTH CAROLINA LACROSSE
1. They are on the wrong side of the Tobacco Road rivalry. Let's be honest, folks, who do you side with: the evil, tiny, elite private school whose basketball players are really privileged and easily hateable? Think about the answer to that question. Now, remember that you're a fan of a tiny elite private school whose basketball players are moderately privileged and kinda hateable. Good. Come to the dark side. GO DUKE. Screw UNC. (Caveat: all this goes out the window if Northwestern wins and so does Duke and they have to play. GO TAR HEELS.)
2. Northwestern always plays UNC and they're always totes huge nuisances. They made NU beat them in overtime after trailing earlier this year, and it would've been much easier for them just to lose outright. And in aught seven, they had the audacity to hand the Cats their only loss of the season in double overtime. This is the crappiest type of rivalry in that it loses all intensity in the postseason when NU craps on them.
3. CUZ.
4. North Carolina has a storied tradition of winning other sports, such as basketball. We don't. GIVE US THIS ONE THING IT'S ALL WE HAVE.
NORTHWESTERN-NORTH CAROLINA WOMEN'S LAX ANALYSIS
I have no women's lacrosse analysis.
WHY TO HATE NORTH CAROLINA LACROSSE EVEN MORE
1. The song "Lazy Day" by Bruno Mars was written by senior attacker Corey Donahoe, who leads the team in scoring with 51 goals.
WHAT SHOULD NORTH CAROLINA DO INSTEAD OF PLAYING LACROSSE?
Come on and raise up. Take their shirts off, and wave them around their heads like a helicopter.
SHOULD NORTHWESTERN WIN?
They're the better team, and they're playing better at this point in time. NC just barely beat Loyola in the round of 16 while NU was busy lambasting Albany. I'm not sure what caused NU to drop two games in the middle of the season, and neither is the lax beat writer for the Daily. But whatever it was, they fixed it. Meanwhile, NC has been dropping games to superior teams all year, and I don't think that will change.