clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

America Less Days Until America Season: No. 59, Pat "America" Hickey

Getty Images

In lieu of commentary, I'm just going to post video of our national anthem seven times:

No. 59, Pat Hickey, junior, long snapper

Who he be: Pat is Northwestern's long-snapper, and by virtue of the fact that his uniform number works out to be the amount of days before Northwestern's opener that is July 4th - don't check my grammar, it's okay, this is America, we're free to do whatever we want - he is Northwestern's most American player. He was a backup long snapper, only handling field goals, at the beginning of his redshirt freshman year, but was taken out of that role, but last year, he was the all-time long snapper and didn't appear to have any problems. As the most American football player at Northwestern, he was given the opportunity to kill Osama bin Laden by long-snapping a ball at his head with lethal force, but he declined out of respect to our troops.

Happy Independence Day, from Sippin' on Purple: Remember, if you mix red, white, and blue together, you get purple. Is that true? Maybe, maybe not, but I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA.

Looking forward: Hickey should be the long snapper this year. You probably didn't notice Hickey much last year because he didn't have any notable screw-ups that I can recall, which is pretty much the best thing you can say about a long snapper, so here's to another year of that.