Oh, so you didn't get enough out of one article about a Northwestern long snapper, huh? You needed a second?
Well, GUESS WHAT: okay. Here's a story on Chris Fitzpatrick, the guy who is currently the backup long snapper but at some point in the very, very near future will be Northwestern's starting long snapper. Bored yet? Ehh, deal with it.
Origin mythSo, you probably won't hear about this for a while, but I'm writing a story somewhere about the recruitment/development of long snappers. Point is, it's a thing that exists, and Fitzpatrick was one of the best in the class of 2012: No. 3 per 247 and Scout, No. 6 per ESPN. He didn't flub a single snap in his entire high school career at Lawrenceburg (Ky.) Anderson County. He was offered a scholarship to Northwestern at an open camp for the elite long snappers in the country after his junior year of high school and immediately accepted. He's also 6'2, 230, and played some defensive end in high school, so it's not like he's not a football player. Oh, you ever wonder what a long snapper highlight reel looks like?
At Northwesterndude redshirted last year.
Anagram of choice
Discovering the Wildcats' true inner selves through spelling
Chris Fitzpatrick, anagrammed, is
FRITZ, CHICK RAPIST
WORST BUSINESS CARD EVER. (The Z and the amount of letters make things difficult here. Other options included "carsick thrift zip," which doesn't mean anything, and "czarist firth pick," which means even less.
Relevant musical selection
"Without Me," Eminem
It's embarrassing, but I literally allowed myself for a moment while writing this to believe Eminem actually said "Chris Fitzpatrick you could get your ass kicked," but of course, it's Chris KIRKpatrick, who is pretty obviously the least or second least prominent member of 'NSync. I went with it anyway, because, well, why not?
Eminem was such a great, great rapper, but the songs of his that made the biggest pop impact were songs that he probably put less than 20 minutes to write -- the "Eminem making crude jokes about celebrities" singles from his first three albums. Well, except for "Lose Yourself," which might be his most prominent songs, and is actually part of the argument you could make for him being one of the most technically gifted rappers of all time.