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Anyway, up next on the countdown is Matt Frazier, a 6'4, 290-pound offensive guard who is pretty certain to get a big old helping of playing time this year considering the way the depth chart pans out.
Origin myth
Frazier hails from Bourbonnais, which you probably know best as "the place stories about Bears training camp are filed from." (It is not, so far as I can tell, filled with Bourbon.) There, he attended Kankakee Bishop McNamara, starting on both sides of the ball as a lineman. He earned all-state as a junior and a senior, picking up the Chicago Catholic League's MVP honors his senior season. (This award is called the Lawless Award, named Lucy Lawless, who was a two-time all-state offensive tackle at St. Rita's before achieving renown as the title character in "Xena: Warrior Princess.") This earned him three stars, the No. 66 offensive guard in the country per 247's composite rankings, but Northwestern was the only BCS school to offer amongst a load of MAC options including NIU as well as Memphis and Florida International. He pledged to the Cats June before his senior season.At Northwestern
Frazier spent last season as a backup at right guard, first behind Chuck Porcelli, then behind Neal Deiters. He played in 11 games, so it's not like he didn't see the field.Anagram of choice
Discovering the Wildcats' true inner selves through spelling
Matt Frazier, anagrammed, is
FRAME ZIT ART
Sorry, Matt. Thus far, you have the most disgusting anagram of anybody, because I don't even know what zit art is, and I definitely don't want to frame it.
Relevant musical selection
"Protect Ya Neck," Wu-Tang Clan
I SMOKE ON THE MIC LIKE SMOKIN JOE FRAZIER/THE HELL RAISER/RAISIN HELL WITH A FLAVOR/TERRORIZE YOUR JAM LIKE TROOPS IN PAKI- i should stop now or else I'm just going to rap all five minutes of this song.
Wu-Tang is probably the group that really got me into rap, and this is a classic: hey, let's just have all nine of us rap with no chorus and see how it goes. (It goes well.) I used to have a dumb t-shirt with a picture of a neck brace with a Wu-Tang logo that says "Protect Ya Neck," but I stopped wearing it because literally nobody got the joke and everybody hated me.
I'm always sad about Inspectah Deck, because it's clear that he's one of the better rappers in the group, which is why they let him go first here and on "Triumph," both legendary hip-hop verses, but he never even came close to having anything resembling an established solo career while other guys in the group did. Being a member of the Clan isn't the worst thing, though. (Being a member of the Klan, on the other hand, is the worst thing. You see? Spelling counts for so much.)
Frazier tweets
Matt operates a Twitter account at @MattFrazier57, and I'm putting it in the top 10 percent of Northwestern football twitters. Sometimes there are tweets on it:
If you missed the joke: Ray Hudson is also responsible for yelling such things as "A MAGISTERIAL STRIKE!" and "NOT JUST A DREAM! A WET DREAM! OF ORGASMIC PROPORTIONS!" and "THAT SHOT HAD MORE CURVES THAN JESSICA RABBIT! ON STEROIDS!" and "SERGIO RAMOS HAS A NIPPLE ERECTION!" and many more. He is Lionel Messi's biggest fan.And once again. Heartbreak turns into sheer delight, orgasmic jubilation. #blackhawks @RayHudson
— Matt Frazier (@MattFrazier57) June 25, 2013
But the majority of Frazier's tweets are just Vines of him doing bro-ey stuff, like fishing:For those wondering, drinking an Arnold Palmer before playing golf doesn't improve your game. Rough day out there today.
— Matt Frazier (@MattFrazier57) June 20, 2013
Boating:Gone fishin https://t.co/DeVM7qlck5
— Matt Frazier (@MattFrazier57) June 19, 2013
And golfing:Boating https://t.co/o1Prd24AC4
— Matt Frazier (@MattFrazier57) June 20, 2013
— Matt Frazier (@MattFrazier57) June 12, 2013True bro.