Watch lists are dumb. They're completely pointless. We already knew that.
But Wednesday, some new Northwestern football Twitter account that has a grand total of 136 followers decided to take things a step further:
Congratulations to the #B1GCats named to the prestigious 2015 @NUFBFamily Watch List! http://t.co/h1zbTVSwm0 #52Days pic.twitter.com/Hk3TT30bbF— #B1GCats FB News (@NUFBNews) July 15, 2015
And no, this is not some fake Twitter account going rogue. This is an actual account run by someone in the program or athletic department. In fact, the watch list appeared on Facebook too:
Yeah, we're all probably thinking the same thing:
Like, what? What is this? What are we watching for? What are these people being watched for? WHY IS WILLIE THE WILDCAT ON THE LIST?
To be fair though, at least we've heard of Willie, which is more than can be said for many of the names on the list. Has anybody heard rumblings about a potential breakout year for Luke Dauch or Chris Cliff?
Wait, and there's more! Five players are on the list twice, including walk-on quarterback Daniel Kubiuk! MAYBE WE'RE ONTO SOMETHING HERE. THERE'S A NEW NAME IN THE QB COMPETITION.
@insidenu also, does this mean only one player will be on northwestern football at the end of the year— Rodger Sherman (@rodger_sherman) July 15, 2015
Well, no. No, we're probably not onto anything.
But hey, we thought, if there can be a 2015 Northwestern Football Watch List, WHY CAN'T THERE BE A 2015 NORTHWESTERN BEAT WRITER WATCH LIST?
So I, along with Chris Emma, got to work:
THE OFFICIAL 2015 #NORTHWESTERN BEAT REPORTER WATCH LIST #B1GCATS #PRESTIGIOUS CONGRATS TO ALL INCLUDED pic.twitter.com/Br4hdRrRHe— Henry Bushnell (@HenryBushnell) July 15, 2015
If you're a bit confused — or more than a bit confused — well, frankly, you're not alone. I constructed the list, but...
THANKS TO @CEmma670 FOR THE HELP, I DON’T KNOW WHO HALF THESE PEOPLE ARE. ALSO BLAME HIM FOR ANY MISSPELLINGS https://t.co/hWvQ7aUIBL— Henry Bushnell (@HenryBushnell) July 15, 2015
Many people expressed their appreciation for their inclusion on the list:
@HenryBushnell I'm honored http://t.co/Ip6GEaPPNX— Jason Dorow (@jasondorow) July 15, 2015
I made it! #B1GCATS https://t.co/4nF16FtTa4— ZP (@zach_pereles) July 15, 2015
@HenryBushnell I'm honored, dear friend— Luke Srodulski (@lsrodulski) July 15, 2015
AS YOU SHOULD BE https://t.co/g6IhBgthNo— Henry Bushnell (@HenryBushnell) July 15, 2015
We were notified of some snubs, but had a message for them:
IF YOU WERE EXCLUDED FROM THE LIST IT’S OKAY YOU CAN STILL WIN/BE NAMED TO/WATCH WHATEVER WE ARE WATCHING FOR https://t.co/hWvQ7aUIBL— Henry Bushnell (@HenryBushnell) July 15, 2015
However, we were horrified to learn that we had left some proper journalists off the list, including Mr. Rodger Sherman. It was a grave mistake. So we felt it was necessary to release a revised list.
Here is the revised, official, prestigious 2015 Northwestern Beat Writer Watch List: