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Alex Pietrzak, Northwestern Wildcats football, No. 61

We'll be honest: we don't know what position Alex Pietrzak plays. Guard?

Rob Carr

Alex Pietrzak is an offensive lineman for Northwestern, and he's a walk-on, and... well... let me put it this way: I can't fully determine what position Alex Pietrzak plays on Northwestern's offensive line. So suffice it to say, this isn't going to be an overly informative profile. What do you want me to do about it? Jerks.

So here goes!

Origin myth

Pietrzak hails from Burr Ridge, which is in the southwest burbs, where he went to Brother Rice, which also is the name of the school that Kemba Walker went to in New York (that no longer exists.) His NUSports profile indicates he only gave up one sack his junior and senior years on a pair of playoff teams, playing sparingly on defense as well, that he did throws in track (like every offensive lineman ever) and that he founded a Model UN club, which is really awful news for any players' chances of playing tim ein college.

At Northwestern

Pietrzak played against South Dakota last year.

Anagram of choice

Discovering the Wildcats' true inner selves through spelling

Alex Pietrzak, anagrammed, is


Go Cats! (Also considered, "Relax peak zit" (Proactiv? Pshhh, you're fine) "Lake Extra Zip" (a really peppy body of water) "Ax trapeze ilk" (murdering circus performers))

Relevant musical selection

"I Get Physical", Pete Rock and C.L. Smooth

I've written before about how Pete Rock is a beautiful, brilliant producer, and this JAM off of their second album, The Main Ingredient, is one of his finest works, probably my favorite song of theirs that isn't "T.R.O.Y." Try listening to it without just nodding your head. Try!

It's just a quick loop of a George Benson guitar sample, but it's such a complex, pretty run that I can and have listen to it for over a half hour at a time. It sounds like summer, right? And the scratchy hook is more of DJ Premier's vibe, but works well here. And although C.L. Smooth has his flaws as a lyricist, his flow tends to perfectly match Pete Rock's beats, and of course, it does here. (It's hard to sound bad rapping over Pete Rock. Pete Rock sounds good rapping over Pete Rock, and he's not even a rapper.)

We're talking about it here because C.L. calls Pete Rock "Pete Rizzock" in one line, and I think that sounds enough like "Pietrzak" to bring it up. It's got all the right consonant sounds, for sure.

How he can help

You can never have too much offensive line depth. He is 6'4 290, so he does have the size to play if needs be.

Depth chart projection

We don't have Pietrzak making the depth chart, in part because we don't know what position he plays.